PRELUDE TO KAMA SUTRA: THE 'AUTHOR'

Mrs. Burton (L); house where they stayed while in Damascus (R).

THE EARLIEST VENICE-NUSANTARA CONNECTION

More than a century before the Melaka sultanate, the Venetian traveller, Marco Polo  made it known to us later in his tavelogue that there were already Muslims when he dropped by at Perlak, Sumatra in 1292. He was on enroute voyage to Venice from China.


The year 1292 is of great historical record for Nusantara.

Later, Melaka at its heights was known as Venice of the East so much so that it was stated that whoever has a stranglehold of Melaka would choke Venice as a trading centre.

Apart from Sumatra (Java Minor) he stopped at the islands of Java, Sondur, Kondur, Pentan, Basman, Samara.

WILLIAM'S GOOD INDIAN'S PRAYER

What William had to say about our king of fruit? "It's nice". Aptly that is what a royal guest would say to show sensitivity to the host. If you read it well, he meant not to embarrass Najib and the public.

Elsewhere, he said "I'd just like to say how delicious the food was but how relieved (I was) that durian was not on the menu". They had a good laugh.

If we trace remarks made by westerners about the durian 99% of the times they found it obnoxious in odour. We like it because we are born with it figuratively speaking.

Whoever put the fruit on exhibit for  the royal reception is forcing his likes before the dislikes of others! Najib is not sensitive to that also. He is a durian lover (apart from Rosmah). He held a durian diplomacy across the straits sometimes ago. There was much belching thereafter that nobody want to open their (foul) mouths!

This belching is a natural to do after the stomach has been stretched by the durian gas. It happened when I had to belched unstoppably after taking a few ulas of (heaped, hence partially feremented) Jenderam durian. The odour filled the whole floor of the restaurant. I heard someone commented "Since when MacD has a durian menu?"

Below is William's Good Indian's Prayer. Not really his actually but of his forebear, King George V (left). Wonder why the title is such? The Prince might know.

If I have any connection at all with Geoge V is that I attended a school that bears his name in Seremban.

Thank you for coming to Malaysia. Please come again. There won't be durian, or belacan, budu or ikan masin served!

BEGIN WITH 'A'

MUHYIDDIN, AKU LEMBU TUNGGANGAN

Aku dilembu tunggangkan oleh skim cepat kaya. Ceritanya
begini.

Kampung ku tidak jauh dari Gemas dimana NFC mengendalikan ladang lembunya.  Dulu banyak cerita peluang busines membela lembu di Gemas. Ada skim peserta boleh pajak10-20ekar, dipinjamkan modal dan beberapa ekor lembu untuk diternak - mengikut kata anak buah yang berminat.

Kemudian ada pula anak buah jadi agen minta melabur dalam syarikat membela lembu (secara virtual) dengan membeli saham.


Tiap saham RM7000 bersamaan sekor lembu. Pulangan anggaran RM1500/tahun. Isteri saya beli 1 saham dan adiknya 3 saham. Surat perjanjian ditandatangani. Ladangnya di Pahang.

Yang menglembukan kami kelakar jugak mereka tu! Lihat gambar pada kad hari raya yang diterima (atas dan kiri).

Untuk tiga tahun permulaan ada pulangan selepas itu cakboliau!  Kami rugi dalam RM2,500 tetapi adik ipar lebih banyak.

Malaslah nak kejar mereka tu. Duit haram tak kemana.

Siapa hantunya yang bertanggung jawab meluluskan projek mega NFC RM250juta? Tiada yang mengaku. Kerajaan pun membisu. Kalau di negeri Jepun sudah ada harakiri kalau tidak pun balik kampung tanam kacang. Sebab itulah mereka maju. Malaysia Boleh!

NFC projek bermula zaman Muhyiddin, Menteri Pertanian. Semasa saya hendak menyampaikan memorandum berkenaan padi kapada dia melalui PAnya tersualah dengan si Salleh tu. Wah, nampak gondok senyumnya tapi setakat greetings sahaja.

Berkenaan memorandum tu, tak kesampaian kerana tidak ada maklumbalas. Malaysia Boleh!

Aku dilembu tunggangkan dan rugi sedikit. Muhyiddin dilembu tunggangkan hanya tercalar imej. Negara rugi jutaan. Malaysia Boleh!

Biarkan si Labu dengan lembu kondonya!!

(CHAPTER) 11 FOR NAJIB

We all started with 11 and end up with 13, in reference to the Federation of Malaya and the formation of Malaysia. The numbers are God-given geographical spread and nothing magic about them.

Dolah likes 13 and believes in it auspiciousness. He got what he want, his fall from grace (for going against the Chinese fengshui).  Numbers do not determine destiny! Believing in them (magical)could lead to syirik.

Astrology is a pseudoscience using certain features of astronomy. Astrologers of the past especially use the signs of nature and universe to predict events, conduct ceremonies, go to war as exemplified in many civilisations -  Egyptian, Aztec, Indian, Chinese.

Fancying in numbers by itself has no merit in governing a country. Decisions are
based on well-grounded rationale.

If 13 brings misfortune then skip it and use 14 instead ( has been done in house or floor numbering). Is this coming PRU13 will witness major upheavels?

What so great about 11? Bankers are familiar with Chapter 11, the last saving effort before bankcruptcy.

How about 11 Sept (L)?

Najib's first penchant is 1. Hence, 1Malaysia. Doubling the stroke becomes 11 (November election; for goodness sake say it straight!), triple it becomes 111 (number of imams sponsored by 1MDB), quadruple it becomes 111.1 (budget for Permata).

After about 11 x 3 years in politics Najib is still groping till the 11th hour.

He is indeed in a maze of his own creation!

BEBASKAN MUHDALENA

Muhdalena
apalah salahnya
dibandingkan ...
sesat dilencong Khalil
masih muda bergaya! berkeluarga ...

Peniaga
suap polis
dibantai 1juta denda penjara 6 tahun
mudanya 24 tahun kasihan!

Dulunya jobless
pembeli ramai
dia jual sijil 
umur dua puluhan

bos saya tipu sijil PhD
naik pangkat jua!

Incest
semenjak Adam
tanggunglah dosa
stress politik?
entah

Alahai
apalah salah mereka masa hadapan
apa jadi?
undang2
takpalah!

Judges
and laws (a)raping

The rape of Sabine
to continue
till 11th hour


MERDEKA
RAIKAN KEBEBASAN!

INSIDE TURKISH DELIGHTS - THE HAREM

Sultan Bargash (1870-88) of Zanzibar had 90 wives, concubines and slaves in his Beit al-Ajaib palace.

But more than 3 centuries earlier, Sultan Suleyman the Magnificient, established in 1541 in the Grand Seraglio at Constantinople's Topkapi Palace (now Hegia Sophia Museum, left below) the famous of all harems. It was headed by his former concubine, Hurrem Sultan, a Circassian whose fame became known as Roxelana to  the West.
 

Scenes of harem life in 1800's. Inside a harem, 1860 showing a flute player (R).

Prima donna or jewel of the harem (L); dinner time (R).

Left: Smoking a chibouque (long-stemmed pipe) or a nargileh (water pipe).

R: Mary Wortley Montagu, a traveller visited a hammam, Turkish bath.

The last of the harem of Turkish sultans was 1909 when the traditional practice was disbanded.